Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Choose a Spouse: Checking the Dye Lot

©Millie McNabb

I remember starting a large project when I had just learned to crochet. As I was selecting yarn, the sales associate told me to check the dye lot, and get all the yarn for the entire project at one time. I didn’t think about that advice when I purchased a dozen pair of black socks. When I sorted them on laundry day, the sock colors ranged were slightly different—black, light black, and brown-black.

A Christian may marry another believer thinking you’re in agreement, only to discover that your understanding of “Christian” varies greatly. One of my friends married a man who told her he was a Christian simply because he knew she wouldn’t marry a non-Christian. So how can you discover the “true colors” of a potential partner?

In a discussion about false prophets, Jesus, said, "So then, you will know them by their fruits.” (Matthew 7:20) Look for the evidence of a changed life. Are his words and actions Christlike? Is he intentionally growing in his faith?

Look for evidence beyond your experience. Ask his friends and family about his professed belief and what effect they have seen in his life. If he objects to your talking to others, that can be a red flag, too.

Look for his interaction with others. Does he have a healthy relationship with other men? How does he interact with women? Is he comfortable around children? How does he treat his mother?

If the dye lot is different--the walk doesn't support the talk--don't buy into that partnership.

Watch for “Belief Plus” on my blog next week for more thoughts on choosing your mate.

God bless….

Millie McNabb, founder of Christian Values Legacy, offers parenting seminars that focus on passing on your Christian values. Request your free report “Considerations for Intentionally Raising Children to Become Christian Adults” today at

1 comment:

Margaret said...

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